Open Wide: Horror Stories From the Chair

Teeth. The thing nobody warns you about until you're crying in the dental chair with half your face numb and a stranger drilling into your mouth for the third time that visit.

This episode is Jan and Patti getting brutally honest about their dental horror stories—the bad dentists, the botched procedures, the money spent, and the hard-won lessons that came out the other side. Spoiler: we both came out stronger (and way more committed to flossing).

What we get into this episode:

• Jan's childhood dentist, who did fillings with zero Novocaine (yes, really)
• Why the dentist's chair can trigger real anxiety and panic, especially if feeling trapped is your thing
• Patti's multi-year nightmare with a dentist who was charming, attractive, and genuinely bad at his job
• The very expensive lesson in people-pleasing and not trusting your gut
• When to see a specialist vs. letting your general dentist handle it
• Teeth grinding, Invisalign, and Jan's $12,000 smile glow-up
• Medications, dry mouth, and tooth loss — something no one talks about enough
• The real reason so many of us go years without seeing a dentist

Bottom line? Trust your gut, get referrals from someone who's had real work done, and for the love of everything — brush and floss twice a day. Your future self will thank you.

Find resources mentioned in this episode here.

Learn more about this podcast here.

Submit your 90-second lesson/experience here.

Apply to be a guest here.

Stay updated on new episodes here.

*Information shared on this podcast is not medical advice. If you have a concern about your physical or mental health, please seek support from a proessional.

Transcript

Things Podcast Ep 26 - Dental Horror Stories - 5:2:26, 1.01 PM

Jan: [00:00:00] Welcome to Things My Mother Forgot to Mention. 

Patti: The podcast where we say everything our mothers didn't. 

Jan: I'm Jan, a trauma therapist and author turned rogue storyteller, here to talk openly about the body, aging, and all the "wait, what?" moments of womanhood. 

Patti: And I'm Patty, an online business and tech nerd whose purpose is to elevate the voices of women in our world, and who doesn't believe in taboo topics.

Things My Mother Forgot to Mention is the podcast for every woman who's ever said, "Wait, why didn't anyone mention this to me?" 

Jan: Join Jan and Patty, two outspoken, curious, outrageous women, as they dive headfirst into a messy, magical, and often WTF realities of aging, health, and quite simply being a woman.

From rogue chin [00:01:00] hairs and vaginal thinning to mental health, perimenopause, and scalp cancer. Yes, really. 

Patti: Nothing is off limits. It's funny, it's raw, it's real talk your mother definitely skipped. 

Jan: Let's get into it. 

Patti: Hi, Jan. 

Jan: Hey there, Patty. Good to see you. 

Patti: Good to see you. How are you doing? I'm 

Jan: doing great, actually.

Um, it's a sunny, nice day out, and you know, spring is actually happening, and there's hope in the air, so- That always brightens my spirit. 

Patti: That's good. Yeah, it's pretty out. It's nice. I mean, it's warm here, but it's... We, we're getting it back into, like it felt summery for a second, and now we're in the 70s, 80s, so now it's- Oh, my

Texas spring. 

Jan: We're not there yet, but, you know. 

Patti: Yeah. Well, but that's spring 

Jan: here, 

Patti: so. Up here in Boston. 

Jan: So today we're gonna be talking about, um, some of our horror stories. Is that right? 

Patti: That's right, of teeth. Okay. So we're gonna start changing our structure a little bit. We were [00:02:00] just chatting- Right ... and I think we can talk about it here.

Uh, the, the structure bit of the podcast. Instead of having two episodes on one topic, we might have some overlapping ideas of episodes, of topics, but we're gonna change them a little bit. Right. So today we're gonna talk about our horror stories of teeth. 

Jan: Well, I have horror stories, things from when I was a child, too.

Ooh. You know, now I'm a little bit older than you are. 

Patti: Yeah. 

Jan: Well, a little. And, uh, uh, and also things my mother forgot to mention about when we'd go to the dentist. Mm. You know, they, our dentist would torture us. So w- we have to talk about our horror stories, and then- Yeah ... I guess we have an, a guest- Yeah

who we'll be interviewing, and he's a real dentist. 

Patti: Yeah. 

Jan: Correct? 

Patti: Yeah. And 

Jan: he'll be giving us some of the, uh, preventative and maintenance, uh, information- Yeah ... which will be helpful, so. That's, 

Patti: uh... So after you get to hear these horror stories, then in the next episode you get to learn how to avoid these horror stories.[00:03:00]

Jan: Yes. 

Patti: Ideally. 

Jan: Yes, ideally. 

Patti: So- 

Jan: But the first thing I have to just say- 

Patti: Yeah ... 

Jan: when I was a kid, we had this dentist who, he was a smoker, and this is what I remember when I was a kid. Oh, no. He was a big smoker, and whenever he'd put y- his, your ha- his hands- ... in your mouth, he would, it smelled like cigarette butts.

Patti: Ugh. Yeah, that's gross. And I smoked for 15 years, and I can say that's gross. 

Jan: Oh, anyway. And the other thing that he did when I was a kid, and my mom never mentioned this, and we tried to tell my mother this, is he never used Novocaine. What? So when he would... Yes. When he would fill all of our fillings, it was without Novocaine, and I really felt that was trauma.

I was traumatized by that. 

Patti: Oh 

Jan: my God. And ever since then, I, when I get into the dentist chair, I, I can tell my whole body starts to brace and tighten up, and like, "Oh my God, here it comes [00:04:00] again," you know? It was, it was, it kind of set a precedent for me for the rest of my life because of that dentist. 

Patti: Well, that's trauma.

Jan: Yeah, it was. Yeah. In your mouth. And especially, the other thing that really comes to mind for me is that when it comes to horror stories about dental work is it's so close. It's so intimate. Yeah. It's in your mouth. Yeah. It's in your face. It's in your brain. Ev- it's like your, uh... It's so intimate, and it's so, uh- I don't know, destructive, that, and I don't know, dentists, that they really get how- Yeah

tough it is for people. 

Patti: Yeah. 

Jan: And for people who've had trauma, they're, they have anxiety disorders. 

Patti: Mm-hmm. Not only that, but something that I feel with it, um, 'cause I'll get a, a bit of anxiety around it, and for me, one of my, um, anxiety triggers is feeling trapped. Oh, yeah. And so in the dentist chair, I feel trapped because- Yes

I have stuff in my mouth, and like, I can't just get up and leave [00:05:00] 'cause I have contraptions- ... or, you know, like, you're kind of stuck there. And so that give, that's the part, like, I worry less even after my trauma that we'll get to with pain. I worry more about feeling like I'm stuck. Trapped. And I get, I get anticipatory anxiety.

Mm-hmm. So I get anxious that I'm gonna have a panic attack, and then I'm not gonna be able to leave. 

Jan: Right. No, it's true. 

Patti: Yeah. I 

Jan: mean, I, I'm claustrophobic, and I- Right ... don't like it when people are in my face, and you know, sometimes they used to use, and this hasn't been done lately, uh, a dam. Have you ever heard of the- Oh, yeah

injection dam? And they put it across in your whole mouth and everything, and, and y- even your airway is starting to be blocked, and you're thinking, "OMG, am I gonna make it through this?" 

Patti: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I have a weird, I don't know where this came from, but I have a weird thing about, uh, my throat. Like, I don't like when people touch my throat.

Yeah. Um, and so when you're laying there, and if you don't have this as a challenge of yours, you [00:06:00] don't think about the fact that when you're laying there, they put instruments down on your chest- Yes, they do. ... and your throat. And so I always have to say, "Please don't put anything on my throat," because that immediately, like, triggers panic for me.

Yes. Like, I don't like, there's something about it. I must've been, like, choked to death in a previous life or something. 

Jan: Yeah. But, but, a- another previous life you had. Yeah But you know, that's a great thing to remember when we talk to Zach- 

Patti: Yeah ... 

Jan: is to ask him how many people have panic attacks or anxiety- Ah

and how he deals with that because that's actually a very interesting thing I've never asked a dentist about- You do that ... that question. Yeah. But that, or, or a hygienist, dental hygienist- Yeah ... where they are putting all kinds of tools on your chest, and it's like, you know, I'm like, "Uh-oh," you know, "here we go," or whatever.

Patti: Yeah. 

Jan: So, um, well, so what happened to you when, uh, uh, when you were a kid? Or is this the horror story- So- ... when you were older? 

Patti: This was when I was older. When I was a kid, I didn't really have too much, like, you know, loose [00:07:00] teeth. Uh, you know, my father, my glorious father, would threaten to, you know, like, tie string around your tooth and then to the door, then slam the door, and then it comes out.

Um, and I feel like, I think I fell off a bike and a tooth fell out once, and there was something traumatic about it, but yeah, I don't remember it. You know, I have lots of trauma brain from childhood, so I don't remember- ... a lot of things. But that was, like, that... But I remember the doorknob thing was, like, a common, like, when we were 

Jan: younger- Did that actually...

He did that with you? 

Patti: I think he did it with my brother maybe. Oh. Maybe it was me. I can't quite remember, but I know that we- Yeah, mm-hmm ... talked about it, that it was... Yeah. And that it wasn't just us. Like, that was a thing I've heard many times is that that's what you do when you're a kid and you've got a loose tooth that's ready to come out, is you tie it around a doorknob and your tooth, and you slam the door and it just pulls it right out.

So there was that. But my trauma was actually very recent. It was a couple years ago. And so, like, I'd always been [00:08:00] pretty o- okay with my teeth, you know? Like, I'd had cavities here and there and whatever, and I had one crown at some point, but I didn't... Like, it was completely unremarkable. I didn't remember anything about it or have any whatever, um, and I've never had problems with it.

So for a very long time, I didn't go to the dentist for an embarrassingly long time because I didn't have insurance. And before I moved out here, you know, I was working at a nonprofit and then I was in school. Like, I couldn't afford it. I couldn't afford to go to a dentist- 

Jan: Yes ... 

Patti: and get all the work done.

It's expensive. It's very expensive, and I was living paycheck to paycheck barely, and I had two jobs. So there w- uh, it just wasn't an option for me. And so when I moved out here and I finally, you know, recently got to a place where I was like, "All right. I can afford this now, and I should probably go because it's been a very long time," and so I went, and, um, to a place f- not far from here that, you know, supposedly was really great and everything.

And they said, you know, I had a couple cavities, but two of my cavities [00:09:00] needed to have a crown put on them. Yeah. And so I was like, "Okay." That they were old and, like, whatever, the fillings were old and stuff. And, and so it was all in my lower right side. So the very back tooth needed a cavity, and then the next two each needed to have crowns.

So I was like, "Okay, great." So he does the work. And, and I have to say this because this affected my decision-making, he was very attractive. And so- 

Jan: Okay. 

Patti: He was very attractive, and he was kinda funny, so it was sort of the situation where I felt flustered sometimes, and I think I l- I didn't s- speak up for myself as much as I should have in some of the situations 'cause I was like, "Well, I'm sure it's fine.

I'm sure he knows what he's doing." So future Patty knows better now. Um, so he does what he does and puts on a couple temp crowns- I go back in and they're like, "Okay, it's just gonna take a second, you know, to pop off the temp crowns and we put in, you know, the, the [00:10:00] permanent." And they wouldn't come off. And so they're pulling, the hy- 'cause they ha- the as- uh, the assistant or hygienist, they pull it off because it's easy, and then he comes in and does...

So they're pulling and they're pulling, like, "It won't come off." And so he comes in, Dr. David was his name, and Dr. David comes in and he's pulling and he's pulling and I'm like, "Ah," 'cause they don't numb you because they're just popping off. And he's like, "Oh, I guess I set them too well." I'm like, "That's not funny."

Jan: Oh, that's very funny. It's my mouth. It's me. I'm 

Patti: like, yeah. And so now he has to start numbing me because he has to drill them to pieces to take them apart- Oh, 

Jan: gee ... 

Patti: to get them out. 

Jan: Oh, 

Patti: gosh. So he's starting to do it, but he didn't numb me well enough, so I'm in pain now as he's pulling. And they keep pull- he keeps pulling to try to get the...

Oh, maybe it's, uh, broken apart now enough to pull. And so I'm like, oh my God, I'm in pain, and in the process he's pulled out, because when they do crowns, right, they put in, like, buildup underneath the crown. Mm-hmm. And so he's [00:11:00] pulling out the buildup in the process 'cause it's all stuck together, and I think he pulled out part of the filling that was in the back tooth.

And so now there's a nerve exposed, and now, now I'm in pain. And he still has numbed me, like, three times and it's not enough, and every time there's water, every time there's air, I'm in horrific pain. Yes. Yeah. And I'm screaming. And he keeps, oh, trying again and trying again. So by the time he gets them out, I'm now, uh, sobbing.

I call my sister-in-law, Tracy, who was on our podcast, to come over 'cause she was around the, lived around the corner, because I was having a panic attack and I couldn't leave. Like I said, like, I couldn't go anywhere because now I have two holes in my mouth and an exposed nerve. And so someone had to come down.

Jan: And what's he saying to 

Patti: you? 

Jan: What, what did he say 

Patti: to you? "Oh, I'm so sorry. Oh, you know, whoa, whoa, you're taking a lot to... You, you, you require a lot of Novocaine." I'm like, "Never in my life-" Oh ... "have the, has this. Like, I don't think I'm the problem here, sir." But, so my sister-in-law comes to hold my hand, and he finally does a [00:12:00] nerve block and just numbs half of my 

Jan: face.

Your whole face is 

Patti: drooped. My whole face. Like, my tongue was like a football. And so- 

Jan: Oh, God ... 

Patti: so while he's in there, he's like, okay. So, uh, he, he now he gets it done, and he has to fix the build-up again because he destroyed that. And then he's like, "Well, I don't like how this filling turned out." I'm like, "This was your filling.

What?" And so he refills the other tooth, and he puts on the crowns. So I leave, and now I'm still in pain. And so I keep calling, and I'm like, "I'm still hurting." He's like, "Well, you just probably need a bite adjustment." And, and I never needed a bite adjustment. I didn't even know what it was, a bite adjustment- Yeah, yeah

which it just means it's too high or something, and so they need to, like, shave the crown down. 

Jan: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. 

Patti: So I kept going in for bite adjustments over and over and over again. And finally he, like, "Well, I think you need a root canal." And I was like, "Are you kidding me?" And so I have a permanent crown in, so [00:13:00] now he has to go back in, numb me again, which he didn't do successfully previously, and again drill apart the crown to remove it to now give me a root canal.

And I was like, "Why did you not know I needed a root canal before this?" My theory, not being a dentist in any way, is that when he was pulling it, somehow something happened, and that's what- Yeah ... created an issue. Um, and so he's like, "Well, you know, you were misdiagnosed, sorry," blah, blah, blah. And at this point I should've switched dentists, but I didn't.

Yeah. Um, so I 

Jan: went back. 

Patti: Oh, 

Jan: dear. So what you learned is that even though he's attractive, he wasn't a good dentist. 

Patti: Wasn't a good dentist. But we're not done. So I go back. So he takes out this, this crown, does the root canal, puts on a temporary crown. And so I'm like, okay. And I come back. Thankfully the temporary crown comes off, and he puts on a permanent crown.

So I'm like, great. I'm done. Hooray. A [00:14:00] year later, I'm brushing my teeth- Mm-hmm ... my crown pops off. And I'm like, "What?" So I contact them, and I'm like, "Hey..." 'Cause this, so this is a, a company who has multiple locations, and so, like, he's one... You know what I mean? Like, it, it wasn't people-focused as much as I thought it might be.

Um, and he doesn't work there anymore. Because I'm like, "I don't wanna see him, but somebody needs to fix this." And he- they're like, "Oh, he doesn't work here anymore." And I'm like I was like, "Oh, my." So I go in, and they're like, "Okay, well..." The, the new dentist is like, "Well, this isn't a very good crown, and I could put a better...

I could make a better crown for you. This is not... That's why it fell off." And I was like, "Oh, that's great." And then he says, "I also can't put it back on without telling you that the root canal isn't done right, and you need the root canal fixed." And I was like, "Okay." So he had over-drilled- [00:15:00] Which meant he went below my gum line, like down too far past the root line or whatever it is, into my jaw maybe.

And so basically it left me susceptible for infection. And so I had to go to an oral surgeon to have her build back up the area and redo the root canal. 

Jan: Oh my 

Patti: gosh. And at that point I called them- That's nasty ... and was like, "I, I need a new crown now." And they're like, "Okay, well, that'll cost you whatever the full cost of a crown."

I'm like, "Excuse me?" And I, I never get bitchy with people because I'm assert- I've always been. I've been in customer service and ser- you know- Mm-hmm ... c- client facing. But I - 

Jan: Lost it ... 

Patti: lost it. Good 

Jan: for you. 

Patti: And they, I tried to talk to management and they didn't allow it, blah, blah, blah. Anyway, so I went to a new dentist, and just like it was nothing, I have this perfect, beautiful crown.

Uh, I never went back to that place and I never left them a review. I probably should. It was, it was horrific what they did. Geez louise. And there was no... [00:16:00] Yeah, like they didn't give me compensation. I'm like, "You traumatized me. You hurt me." They gave me a trauma discount after that one really bad session, and they knocked off a couple hundred bucks, but like my crown was just past a hu- a, a year when it fell out, and therefore it was no longer covered under a warranty.

So that was my, my horror story. Oh, 

Jan: it certainly is. Oh my gosh. 

Patti: It was like everything you fear about the dentist is what happened. Mm-hmm. Um, it was pretty... But that'll teach me to never not go to the dentist again for a long period of time. And- No, 

Jan: I, I totally agree with you ... it can be very- Because, um, when, when you're having that much invasive work on, in three different teeth- 

Patti: Yeah

Jan: uh, usually it disturbs the nerves and- Yeah ... the roots, and it, um, I, I... Same thing ha- not exactly like that happened to me, and I think that's one thing you have to be very cautious about is not [00:17:00] to, uh, have someone of course that doesn't know what they're doing- Right ... you know, mucking around with the three different teeth, and big molars too, you know?

Yeah, 

Patti: yeah. 

Jan: Unbelievable. 

Patti: Yeah. Well, and I think too, uh, one of the things I learned was to trust myself, and that there were several times in that process, I mean, attractiveness aside, whatever, but like I, I'm a people pleaser too, so I think I was worried about hurting his feelings and being like, "I don't want you as my dentist," like, "I don't trust you."

Yeah. I mean, trust is a really big thing as we're talking about. And so I think for me, that trust was gone really quickly, but I was second guessing myself. Mm-hmm. And I, I probably should have after the first incident been like, "Oh, no, I'd like to see a different dentist, please," and- Mm-hmm ... not worried about his feelings, not worried...

You know, I was trying to give him the benefit of the doubt. Oh, you know, things happen, blah, blah, blah. But in the end, I mean, it cost me thousands 

Jan: of dollars. Mostly, [00:18:00] and just my, as I've matured and learned more about teeth and maintenance- 

Patti: Yeah ... 

Jan: is that, um, m- most dentists, your dentist that does the fillings and maybe a crown, they are not oral surgeons.

They're not... They shouldn't be doing root canals. 

Patti: And I had somebody said that to me after I w- was in the middle of this, and I was like, I had never thought about it before- Yes ... because I'd only ever had one root canal, which is where the other crown was, and I think my dentist did it. And so I had never heard of that, but that is apparently a common thing now is- Yes

you're supposed to not have that Yes, that you should go- Yeah ... you 

Jan: should go to an oral surgeon because they take, they look at where the root is. Right. They make sure they fill it. They do all the x-ray. They do it right so- Have the specialists ... you don't have a problem with like, "Oh, I'm sorry, we drilled too far."

Yeah. "It's not done right." Oh, my g- 

Patti: Right. Yeah. 

Jan: That's horrible. 

Patti: Yeah. Oh my gosh. Exactly. Yeah. The, the dentist, your, your dentist should be [00:19:00] for your maintenance and for that sort of thing, but those bigger, invasive things need to go through a specialist. And now I know, and, you know, ideally also I take better care of my teeth now than I, than I used to.

Good. Um, you know, I brush and floss twice a day. I just, I went to... 'Cause I found another amazing dentist who's a woman, and I just love her so much, and so- Mm-hmm ... that's been really good. So I, six months, I went and got my cleaning, and she's like, "Oh, you, I can tell you have exceptional oral care." And I was like, "Excellent."

And so that made me feel good. I'm like, "That's right, I floss and brush twice a day," da, da, da, da, da. She's like, and talking to her assistant, she's like, "See, I can tell she flosses a lot because she's not flinching. She's not..." Yeah. And I was like, "That's right, I 

Jan: do." Well, you know, the reason why you're doing that is where, when you get to be my age, uh, is that your gums start receding.

Patti: Yep. 

Jan: I don't know if you know that. Mm. That happens when you get older. Yeah. And so you have to really... And it, if it, they recede too much, then it exposes, you know, the, y- [00:20:00] the roots un- un- underneath. Yeah. And it, it, you're prone to getting infections and as well as food stuck there, which cause more problems.

Yeah. And so, I mean, keeping your gums, I mean, some people, you know, really don't pay attention to that. And, um, but it's interesting. Yeah. I was just, as I was listening to you, I'm thinking, I think I've had in my whole lifetime, um, you know, one, two, you know, like I used to change dentists like every, every year- 

Patti: Mm

Jan: because I never really liked what they were 

Patti: doing. 

Jan: And they had done some damage. And so I've had root canals done now by, only by oral surgeons. 

Patti: Hmm. 

Jan: And even teeth pulled. If I, I had to have some teeth pulled, and that was done by an oral surgeon. Um, I did- Wow ... not have my regular dentist do that. 

Patti: Right.

Jan: And my regular dentist, who I absolutely adore now, and he's got one of the best of Boston for a top 10 dentist, you know, in Boston area. 

Patti: Nice. 

Jan: He's amazing, and he, um, [00:21:00] he has... Uh, I was just saying, I think I have an implant- Hmm ... which came because of problems like what you had. Hmm. I had a dentist that wanted to take out all of my silver fillings because he said they were bad for you.

Patti: That's what mine said, too. And then I talked to my new dentist, and she's like, "They're fine. They look in great shape." 

Jan: Yeah. 

Patti: Yeah. 

Jan: That's exactly what this doc- dentist said, you know, "They're fine. They're not leaking. They're in great shape. If they were starting to crack or whatever, then that's a whole different story."

Patti: Right. 

Jan: But he said leave them, you know. Yeah. If it ain't broke, don't fix it , you know? Right. But of course, I went to one dentist that said, "No, we have to take them all out." Mm-hmm. And I went along with that, and then when we got halfway there and having problems, he put a bridge in, and then the bridge broke, and then

Patti: Oh, my goodness ... 

Jan: then the teeth got infected, and so I ended up having my teeth pulled. Uh, so I have an implant, um, in my mouth, and that's a whole horror story, too. Uh, implants, man, it's... You know, when [00:22:00] people have teeth that have been pulled, you have to wait for the, the gum to heal. Right. And then if it's, uh, after that, then they take this huge spike, and they, they pound it into your jaw.

Oh, my gosh. Into... Yes. And it wa- Talk about someone in your face and pounding. I mean, I, I remember in tears, like tears were just rolling off my eyes, and I'm thinking, "Oh, my gosh, I hope I can make it." 

Patti: Did it hurt, or was it just, like, the, the pressure of that ha- like- 

Jan: Pounding. The pounding of your head. Yeah.

That's intense. I mean, it's what they're using. I know. It is. It is... Implants. And then I left that guy, um, and then found another pers- uh, dentist, went to an implant, and then I let... I finally found my dentist I have now. And of course, the implant that they put in wasn't the right one, and so it was like, oh, my gosh.

So he, ever since I've met him, he, he fashioned a tooth that would fit on the implant, and then the teeth that were around it [00:23:00] were h- still never calmed down. The nerves never calmed down. Right. So I ended up having those teeth pulled, too. So on one side of my mouth, I only... I don't have two molars in the back.

It's, it's- Wow ... Yeah. 

Patti: That's so c- it's so amazing the, the damage that they can do- Can be done, 

Jan: yes ... 

Patti: if you don't have a good... It's, that's why it's so scary. E- 

Jan: exactly. It is, and so you really need to research your dentist. H- listen to, you know, this is a referral I got, and I love this guy, and he's, you know, did some research on, you know, his history.

And so then I've been with him for maybe 15, 20 years now. Mm. And what I love about him is that m- and so for all the people who are listening, if you are a, um, a, a person who when you sleep you grind your teeth- 

Patti: Mm, yeah ... 

Jan: do not continue doing that. Because I from all... And they tried telling me that, yeah, I know I [00:24:00] grind.

Yep, yeah, I know I grind. I don't care. I don't care. And then I thought, okay, I'll, I'll get a, you know, um, a mouth guard. Mouth guard. Oh my gosh, the mouth guard. Talk about e- they were, like, huge. And I'm thinking, "Okay, now I can't sleep." Right. So, uh, uh, that was never a solution for me. So unfortunately, I groun- I was grinding my teeth so much that my front teeth actually were completely almost shorter than the rest of my teeth.

Yes. Whoa. And so this dentist that I go to now, $12,000 later, Wow ... I, these two front teeth, you can't even tell that they're not real. They're, they're crowns, yeah. Oh. He had a desig- this guy come in with a, a photography, and he took pictures of my mouth, and they matched the teeth exactly and the color and everything, and they...

And no one who's ever said anything to me has never noticed that. But I had them done, and then I also had, because my [00:25:00] parents, my mother, "Oh, you don't need braces, Jan." Oh. And my brothers got 'em. I didn't. And, um, I did Invisalign. So I did Invisalign for $6,000 and then I had two new teeth for $6,000. And it's the...

changed my life. I'm serious. Yeah. Wow. Because if you ever looked at pictures of me, my husband finally said to me, "Jan, why don't you just do something and get your mouth fixed," you know? Because whenever you see a picture of me- Mm. Oh ... I'm, I'm not smiling. I'm, I'm smiling, but I don't show my teeth 'cause I was too embarrassed.

Patti: Right. And 

Jan: so finally he fixed them, and I do wear retainers when I sleep at night, but they, they also are like mouth guards so that my mouth, my bite doesn't move and my teeth don't get, um, you know- 

Patti: Yeah, I was gonna ask about the grinding then. So, so you don't grind anymore now because you wear a retainer?

Jan: Yeah. I do grind with those, and I'll h- probably have to have them replace these retainers, which I don't know what they'll... Everything's so expensive [00:26:00] when it comes to - Right ... dentists. Um, which I'll have done. Um, but these ones I've had for maybe a year. Mm. So, uh, but it's really changed my life, so Wow. Um- Uh, he's the guy who saved my mouth, uh, who ended up helping me with, uh, you know, the implant and getting a tooth on it, and then helping me with, you know, doing Invisalign and then doing my two new front teeth, so 'cause I - Wow

ground them down so much. So, uh- Wow ... so that's a good story at the ending. That is amazing. But it really says look out for those dentists- Yeah ... that wanna change all your cavities- Yeah ... because they're silver, or they... Y- you gotta get history on them. I don't know if there's some kind of a database for it.

Do you know if there is? 

Patti: I don't know. I know, I, yeah, I'm not sure. We should look into that. Yeah, I mean, and I know, like, the thing is at this place, and this is one of the reasons I stopped going there, is everybody there was so young. And so I kind of had this feeling of like, oh, like they're using this as like a little dentist assembly line, and they get the youngest [00:27:00] dentist.

And so I'm sure they're cheaper for this organization. You know, they were running it like a business, which it- Yeah ... should be run as a business, but they were really running it as a business. It wasn't- Right ... about the people. It wasn't about dentistry. It was about a business, very clearly. Right. And so, like, they would offer, you know, "Oh, if you give us a good review, we'll give you free teeth whitening stuff."

Oh, great. Like, and that is a red flag. So. 

Jan: Yeah. Yeah. I, 

Patti: you know, just like with doctors- But I think with researching them and, and- 

Jan: It's really hard with doctors- Yeah ... too. 

Patti: Yeah. 

Jan: Um, there is no database you can really go. I- and that's why whenever I go to a doctor or orthopedic surgeon, I always ask for a referral.

Patti: Yeah. 

Jan: Um, and I usually ask for a referral from the doctor that I'm seeing. You know? Yeah. Like, so who would you recommend as a neural surgeon? Right. Or who would you recommend for doing Invisalign? You know, because the... You know, if you like your one doctor or dentist- Right ... you know, you should get referrals from them, or friends that you know have had really good work done.

Patti: Yeah. Like- Exactly. And I think specifically when you're looking for [00:28:00] referrals for dentists, not just like, oh, you get your teeth cleaned and have an occasional cavity filled. You don't need that. You need to find a referral from somebody who's had some stuff done and- Yeah ... seen some things because most dentists are gonna do fine with cleaning and, you know, main ca- like cavities and stuff like that.

But when we get into that deeper stuff, that's where you need to make sure you have somebody who's experienced. And I think for me, like, what I learned too is not, like, like therapy, I don't want a baby dentist. I want somebody who's been around- 

Jan: Yeah ... 

Patti: who's been doing stuff for a while, they've seen all the things.

And I don't have- Right ... much happening. Like, it's pretty... You know, like, part of me even wonders if, because I didn't have any pain in tho- that area when I went in- But it was the fillings that needed to. And so part of me is like, did this all happen simply because they were like, "Oh, your fillings, you duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, and you need new feeling, fillings."

Um, yeah, get second opinions if you're not sure. Follow your gut for sure. Mm-hmm. [00:29:00] Because I don't wish what I experienced on anybody. 

Jan: Anyone. 

Patti: It 

Jan: was horrible. But, you know, it, it really does speak to getting a good referral. Yeah. Getting someone who's really experienced. But also, you know, teeth maintenance.

Yes. Like taking care of your teeth, your gums, flossing and all those things, as much as your mom would say that to you or didn't- Yeah ... say it to me. Yeah. But, uh, you know, I think about sometimes when I'm struggling with, uh, teeth issues, you know, as you get older, most of your teeth start going, actually. I mean, I was just thinking if I were to count my mouth, I think that half of my mouth are crowns because- Mm

everything- 

Patti: Yeah ... 

Jan: does not last forever. 

Patti: Yeah. My mom, she... We're, uh, we're trying to figure out why, but we think part of it is because she's been on so many medications and that- Oh, sure ... causes dry mouth, so she has lost like over half of her teeth. Yes. And we're in the process now of trying to figure out a denture- Yes

situation and 

Jan: all of that. In fact, that's so, [00:30:00] that is so true. In fact, I know a friend of mine who she takes a lot of different medication, and it's dried up a lot of her mouth. And because of that her whole teeth, all of her teeth are going. Yeah, they just 

Patti: fall out. 

Jan: Yep, they fall out. They're just, they're, they don't- Yeah

and, and of course, then you have to get implants, which are very expensive and painful. 

Patti: Oh, 

Jan: yeah. And then you have to get a tooth put on them, and then it's like u- unbelievable at how much- Yeah ... money you can run up. 

Patti: We were... So we've gone with her to kind of assess things so far. And because she has a few teeth, but they all need to go at this point, because they're all just at that point where they're gonna break out on their own.

They're either gonna break off or fall out. Like, literally she'll just be doing whatever and a tooth will fall out. Like, it's really upsetting for her. And so she has like one little tooth in the front at this point. Oh. So it's not good. And so it's getting also, not only is she also not wanting to smile, she doesn't like talking as much- Right

because she's embarrassed. Um, but it's hard for her to eat. Right. So we [00:31:00] started pricing it, and I think one place was like thir- 20 to $30,000 for everything, 'cause, so we, 'cause- But can't 

Jan: she get dentures? Can't she get dentures? Well, 

Patti: that's the thing is so we were- Yeah ... looking at dentures, but so we still have to have all the teeth that are there removed that are left, so that's extractions, so that's expensive.

Yeah. And then because of- The way her, the bottom jaw is, she would need two implants that the dentures would clip into because otherwise- Yep ... they would slip out. Yeah. And then the top would just be like the suctiony, you know, dentures. But even at that, that whole process, it would be like 20-something thousand dollars, and that's really expensive, and we just, we don't have that.

So we were honestly like, "Can we go to Mexico?" And like, 'cause they have- Uh-oh ... they do that. Um, and there's a lot of really great stories, and we have referrals for that actually from my good dentist. Um, but there's also, we're looking at some other options at this point. We're trying to figure it out. But [00:32:00] yeah, it's, it's worth it to- But I had a-

take 

Jan: care of them ... I had a client and her husband had that, and had all of his teeth pulled, and then they put implants all around his mouth and, in the top, and then put the teeth in on top of it. But 

Patti: yeah. 

Jan: And it was like $35,000. 

Patti: Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's very expensive, and that's why with this they're, only, they would only do two, 'cause her bones are not that strong anymore, so she- Yes

she can't really handle that many implants anyway. Right. So that's why they would just do two implants and then the dentures would clip into those- Mm-hmm ... on the bottom side, and then the top is just suction. So there's a lot out there. Well, all this, 

Jan: all this says- Take care of your teeth ... 

Patti: take care of 

Jan: your teeth 'cause it's gonna cost you a fortune when you get older.

Patti: Yeah. 

Jan: If you don't. 

Patti: I am die hard, I do not go to bed before flossing and brushing. I don't do anything in the morning before flossing and brushing. I am die hard at this point 'cause I'm like, "I, no thank you." Okay, never, never again That's great. So [00:33:00] yeah. Well, next time we get to chat with, um, Dr. Zach, who's gonna...

Who's a dentist, and he's gonna talk about teeth maintenance and his experience as a dentist. We can ask him some fun questions about that stuff. Yeah, 

Jan: we can ask him a lot of fun questions- ... after this conversation. 

Patti: So, doctor. 

Jan: Have you ever drilled too far on... No. Um, but 

Patti: I think that's great. It'll be fun to, to hear a- Mm-hmm

dentist's perspective. Follow 

Jan: through 

Patti: with it. We 

Jan: don't- You know, 

Patti: well- Yeah, we don't do that. But in the meantime, brush and floss, everyone. Brush and floss. Right. Do your research. Mm-hmm. Find a good dentist, and trust your instincts. 

Jan: Yeah. 

Patti: If you think you should change dentists, change dentists. 

Jan: Mm-hmm. 

Patti: So that's- Amen 

Jan: to that.

Patti: Amen to that. Yeah. Thanks, Patty. Thanks, Jan. 

Jan: Thanks for listening to the podcast. If you like what you've heard, please share it with friends, subscribe, and leave a review. 

Patti: And remember, information shared on this podcast is not medical [00:34:00] advice. If you have a concern about your physical or mental health, please seek support from a professional.

Jan: If you have a story you'd like to share about things your mother forgot to mention, you can apply to be a guest. 

Patti: We'd also love to hear a quick 90-second thing you've learned in your life. 

Jan: You can find links to both of those over at our website at- 

Patti: thingsmymotherforgottomention.com, 

Jan: or in the show notes.

Thank 

you.